WTF?! (Rant)
Cruising through craigslist is always a good time. Where else can you find a great antique velvet chair, a bunch of free organic tomatoes, a puppy!, and a boyfriend (so I’ve heard, so I’ve heard) in one convenient place? Other than a flea market in Florence!
But today, whilst searching for that leather club chair I need so badly, I stumbled over to the farm & garden section and found this piece of work!
Ok, try to read this nonsense:
“Yes i trap,poisin help kill
gophers[thomysedies] moles also,they become earthly active soon,now as ground is soft dont send mounds,but compress earth ,and they never leave a entrance for snakes,ever,have to get [QUEEN]as males are subordinates,and juvenile females,at first sign of tunnels,is time,ive had gophers dig 30 ft.for a plant,not any more,i do this cheaply,and i get them,So no planting is protected,but plant some tomatoes and see,radishes?i do not have to get big money as i like eliminating the issue[gophers],and i take the bodys,ive caught many,even QUEENS,Males are workers,only lead male [strongest] is allowed to breed[queen]“
**Now, I don’t take issue with killing gophers. I do feel bad since they are just trying to eat, and I don’t EVER recommend, suggest or pretend it’s ok to poison them – but if you want to trap your gopher that’s decimating the garden, go for it. But can’t we try to keep some dignity for those poor little bastards? I mean – this person clearly can’t formulate a cohesive sentence… and when people use CAPS in their posts (ok, I did it once above) it’s them YELLING AT YOU, and personally, I don’t like to be yelled at.
Gardener’s: if you want more info on getting rid of your gophers (somewhat) humanly, check the links in this sentence.
21 Responses to “WTF?! (Rant)”
Oh my LOL! Well, if it’s any consolation, we won’t hire them! We never use poison though. Raised beds, wired underneath so the nasty lil’ rodents can’t chomp the roots…wire around the roots of our fruit trees, and I admit, we do trap. However, as they’re ‘organically’ trapped (i.e. no poison…we drain into TWO creeks here), we leave the remnants on the soil surface to encourage their natural predators to give us a hand around here. We’ll always have gophers…and I don’t mind a few, but gosh darn it, they’re prolific, and very hard on the gardens here en masse. Just goes to show, you have to be a bit savvy cruising Craigslist! Thankfully here, if we need help with our gophers, we can go to Gophers Limited (http://www.gopherslimited.com/) No poison, and grammatically correct too!
Wow that ad almost sounds like some of the spam I get from the Far East. Unintelligible ads probably won’t bring the gopher hunter much business!
I have poisoned mice in the past, but never gophers. I have accidentally poisoned a gull, semi-deliberately poisoned an ant, and I have been known to suffocate moths.
We don’t have gophers on this side of the pond, but if we did, this is how I would deal with them.
I’d wait until it was a nice sunny day, and put out some nice cakes and chilled wine. Once they were lured out into the open for the garden party, I’d suggest we all took a drive out to the coast. They’d be excited by the prospect of ice cream and candy floss by the seaside, and agree. Once they were in the car, I’d drive them all out to the marshes and get them to dig their own graves. Then I’d politely explain that if they so much as even thought about my vegetables ever again, I’d terminate them, their families, their friends and all other gophers in a very slow and painful fashion.
There; it’s not that difficult, is it? Perhaps the gopher hunter should contact me for a little advice.
I like you style Idiot Gardener, I like your style.
I depend upon snakes and hawks to get rid of unwanted rodents, and they do a pretty good job. Thanks for visiting my own blog and taking time to comment. I appreciate it. I enjoyed this post and look forward to learning more about your garden.
Well, I thought we had the reputation for scary critters down here. I’ve never had to contemplate wiring beneath the roots of plants to protect them from anything!
I’ve not looked at Craigslist, but I hope the potential boyfriend offerings are a little more appealing than the exterminators.
I am lucky enough not to have gophers as well, squirrels however run my garden, deciding what should live or what should die. I just live with them and plant twice as much!
I don’t know what that guy was taking when he wrote that passage, but it sure wasn’t vitamin pills. “Plant some tomatos and see, radishes”. Whaaat???
I think a mockery video needs to be made for YouTube. Matti
Ya, a video would be cool… I could also see this turn into some sort of garden rap. Just a thought.
How could you read that?! I tried and couldn’t make it all the way through. Now I must go apply BandAids to my eyes.
My cats take care of them….mice too…..squirrels
Don’t like poison.
Wow…that’s really gonna get the customers to call…not.
I think you answered it yourself. They can’t even formulate a sentence. I kind of gophers, moles and voles, but this was very bad. It did sound like one of my neighbors though.~~Dee
Here’s my hit. This appears to have been written by someone in a foreign country (or a person who does not speak English) who constructed the piece by either letting a computer translate for him (like babyl fish) or they actually looked up each word or phrase and let a computer translate piece by piece. Clearly. Bet.
And, yes, they don’t know what they are doing. 
You have a point there. Craig’s list attracts all sorts. Funny thing is he doesn’t even know any different.
LMAO! Typing etiquette, punctuation and complete thoughts obviously aren’t necessary in order to trap the crap out of some gophers! Sometimes (okay, often) I think humans really aren’t at the smartest creatures on Earth.
I rest my case. “I think humans really aren’t at the smartest creatures on Earth.” Yeah, the “at” was a typo.
Someone forgot their meds when they posted, apparently. LMAO!